4 Things gleaned at Time Out For Women

When my friends proposed attending Time Out For Women, I was cynical about it. Largely because I am cynical about LDS singers and authors in general and that's pretty much the gist of the event. But I decided to try it out. Who knows, I might learn something valuable (like how to be less cynical).

Plus I really wanted the bag they give out for free.


The FIRST thing I learned is that you can buy the bag there. No one told me that. I could have sent money with someone already attending and skipped the 10 hours of presentations altogether. I could have bypassed the Mormon version of the Sweeney Sister on Friday night altogether. But then I wouldn't have been able to get a hotel with these adorable women and eaten at Pizzaria Bianco.

Secondly, while sister-watching at the convention, which was a line-up of the latest in DownEast Basics fall fashion, I learned my lackluster wardrode needs a shot of accessory. TOFW is all about accessories. (I had been warned about this by an equally cynical sister-in-law.) Apparently, I need flowers. I need necklaces. I need necklaces with flowers. I need tall boots (do I?). Mostly, I need scarves. Scarves everywhere. I'm intrigued with this. Never having used a scarf for anything other than avoiding frostbite while trick-or-treating as a kid in Idaho, the whole notion of applying them as fashion decor is a little foreign.

The theme of TOFW was Choose to Become. "All things are possible to him that believeth." Discover your Possibilities. Bolstered by my accessorizing Mormon cohorts, I believe I can maybe do this. I can wear scarves. I can! I only have 4 months to do it before it's too hot here in Phoenix for a scarf. So I bought this (at DownEast). What was I thinking? It's a stretch I know. But I'm determined I must try. I need help.

So, uh.

What do I wear with a scarf like this? Do I need to return it and start with something a little less...um, a little less? Do I wear it with a short jacket and go with the layered look? Do I wear it with a simple T? Help?

I'm pretty sure the presenters of TOFW didn't plan on the theme pertaining to scarves. But we can all hear the same talk and take away different things. We all know that.

Third. From Laurel Christensen, my favorite presenter who shared this story. I learned to not be the one thing standing in my way. That resonated with me. I find myself hiding myself. I stand in my way of my goals all the time. For example, I have always loved to write. Always. Why don't I write? What's my hang-up? I don't even blog anymore and I love blogging. I will don my scarf and write. I won't stand in my way.

Fourth. From Kris Belcher, another favorite presenter. As a young mother, Sister Belcher had cancer that caused blindness. She taught that we can overcome anything with faith. My favorite quote from her was Focusing on the darkness doesn't get out out of the darkness. We need to focus on Christ. She said people tell her all the time how strong a person she is because God wouldn't give you this trial if He didn't know you could get through it. She said that isn't true. God gives us trials all the time that we can't get through by ourselves. That's why we need the Atonement. That's why we need His help.

That's what I really went to TOFW to learn.

The need to accessorize is probably secondary to all that.

Details

Once Blake and I were dining at a Sweet Tomato and I left the table to get some ice cream. I came back with chocolate swirl in a salsa bowl. Blake said, "I knew you'd get the wrong cup."

I'm not a stickler for what people consider details. Details have always been Blake's domain, and I lose patience with them. I rarely pay attention to where we park at the mall, which sidestreet has an on-ramp to which freeway, how to buy a movie ticket on-line, what our account number is at the bank, which bowl is intended for ice cream. That sort of stuff. I know Blake is on it so I am just kinda along for the ride. It's nice to be oblivious.

Then along comes an invitation from my brother Brandon and his wife for me to fly to Indiana- alone. I'm ecstatic for the opportunity to see/hold/breathe in my twin newborn nieces. But the thought of having to manage my own details is a little daunting. For one thing I have only flown once since the 1900's. That was on the way home from my brother Brett's wedding in 2005. And now look at those newlyweds:



(Taken at Small's ordination this past July, the "newlyweds" are at the far right.) They have a toddler and are building Child #2. It's been a while since that matrimonial flight. On that trip I was with my parents so I got to still be the child, even though I had my three children with me. My mom took care of the details and got us from Southern California to Salt Lake City without incident.

But tomorrow. Blake is going to drop me off at the airport and drive away. And I will have to check in luggage by myself, find my gate, secure a boarding pass and probably even buy myself a little lunch, and unboard myself when (if) I get there. My brother Brett assured me that there will be little ladies in white dresses silently pointing the way I should go. Or maybe he was referencing someplace else.... (He also confided he's not the brains in his marriage either so maybe I shouldn't seek his wisdom.)

Well. I'm going to do it. I'm going to fly by myself tomorrow. Wish me luck.


I hope I land in Indiana because I really want to see those babies.

*Pictures courtesy of their mother Anna who didn't grant permission but I know she won't get mad because I'm flying on an airplane by myself to help her*

bottom picture taken by mooshinindy- see her at www.mooshinindy.com

away from my desk

I've had other things to do than blog.

Blake's baby sister Barb got saddled to a great guy. We drove a thousand miles to see it, and would have driven a thousand more not to miss it.


Barb and her five brothers. I had to add this one so my Maricopa friends could see that there are spare Blakes out there in case we lose one.


How could we have kept these cousins apart on such a special day? They would never have allowed it.

Rites of Passage

Rites of passage differ wildly from culture to culture and nation to nation. For example, among the Luiseño Indians, a Native California tribe, prepubescent boys lay on red ant mounds for long periods of time. Not crying out in pain means they have become men.

In the upper elite circles of French aristocracy, young girls who are reaching marrying age are given "coming-out parties" where they are formally introduced to the neighborhood's red-blooded bachelors in elegant debutante balls.
Native Hawaiian tribes have a hut where ladies go when they begin...becoming ladies, to put in delicately. They spend their "time" there getting pampered by other ladies who welcome them into womanhood with great veneration.
In the conservative Mormon culture I grew up in, rites of passage are definably less cruel or ostenstatious. These include 1) getting your first haircut as an infant, and 2)entering baptismal waters at 8 years old. Still later in life, another significant rite of passage in becoming a Mormon woman is learning to embellish scrapbook pages which depict your first haircut and Baptism Day.

But perhaps the most grueling and monumental of all rites of passage in Mormon culture is the day that you host your first extended family reunion.

I am now a woman.

Autumn in Idaho

I woke up today still wondering how it's possible I am here in Idaho, an unexpected whirlwind of last-minute planning, driving, fast food, driving, fast food, driving that carried us here for Grandpa's funeral. I can't remember the last time I got to see fall in all its splendor. I forgot how beautiful this season is. I don't know how many choices we had about our lives before God placed us here, but if I got to pick the season I could die in, I would have circled fall. There's something so apppropriate about the idea, especially to celebrate a life long-lived, and well-lived.

It was a beautiful funeral and how fitting the graveside services took place in a soft rain. No one complained about the cold, there were umbrellas for everyone. How could we complain? Grandpa would have thought the whole thing too much fuss over him anyway, ridiculous so many of us traveled so far to stand in the rain at a graveside in Sugar City, Idaho. It was a wonderful reunion with cousins I hadn't seen for years, their children now the ages I will always think of them as being.

And now we get stay for a week. It's fall break after all and the kids were out of school anyway. Thanks, Grandpa, for timing it so perfectly for us! My kids are unfamiliar with Grandma's house in autumn- first things first: there are leaves to play in.

Baptism Day

It was a whirlwind weekend that got off to a weird start when Blake started on Wednesday with a goopy eye. We were pretty sure it was our friend Mr. Pinkeye paying us a visit so Blake went to the doctor and got a prescription to keep us from being contagious to our weekend guests. Blake's sister Barbara flew in Thursday night and got to go to Pack Night with us to see Conner earn his Bear. It was her first experience with roller coaster cheers and lame skits and I forgot to warn her about those, but she had fun.
Friday afternoon Blake's parents arrived, and Steve and Keri and their family came shortly after. My kids were ecstatic to have their cousins here. They are primarily cousin-starved and it was a party atmosphere all weekend.
Saturday morning there was no improvement on Blake's eye. If anything it was worse since he woke up with it sealed shut. But he was able to baptize his daughter anyways, apparently the priesthood is still effective with just one eye. It was a good meeting. Blake's Mom and Smalls gave great talks. Smalls spoke about how the Holy Ghost was like your favorite blanket and pulled her blanket out of a backpack. She said later, "When I saw that blanket I really wanted to hold it!" Mikayla, Meg, Mason, Conner and Claire sang "If the Savior Stood Beside Me." There must have been a leak in the font because the water was a foot and a half lower than when the bishop arrived that morning, and during the first attempt at dunking her, Butterfly girl's toe came up. It was done the second time just right. Blake had to really lower her pretty far down and her foot started coming up but she pulled it back under her just in time. So it counted and our sweet girl is officially baptized a member of the church. We had psuedo-Cafe Rio for brunch afterwards and drew a good crowd. Butterfly was spoiled by lots of gifts and hugs and we are honored to have such good friends and family in our lives.
The kids spent Saturday swimming and playing Wii and playing Hogwarts. Blake went to an Urgent Care and got a stronger prescription for his eye and an eye patch so he wouldn't have to squint. We called him Popeye all weekend.
Everyone took off this morning and our house is big and empty. The kids are staying home from school today. We all need naps today! I don't envy everyone their LONG drive back to Utah and Idaho and hope all goes well for them. Blake woke up with his other eye inflamed so he's at an opthamologist now. Hopefully that will be in the past before too long. Here are some pics of the weekend. I should have put them in a slide show, but oh well. Enjoy them anyway.

Accountable

Barbara and young Padawan Cap'n Blake What was life like before Game Cube and Wii? I can't imagine what kids would do...
Butterfly girl wouldn't smile for anything. She was hungry and we wouldn't let her eat in that dress. What a disobedient girl: she'll have to repent now.
The Scoresby Traditional Family Shoot before church. With 4 cameras pointing at us we happened to not be looking at the one we own. Notice Blake's still squinting. The eye infection is still bad, but he refrained from wearing the eye patch to church.

Eleven and Counting

Remember when

We slept on a full-size bed?

Our monthly rent was $265 a month?

We could serve ourselves dinner and eat it warm?

We could leave the house without bringing diapers, car seats or fruit snacks?

We could cuddle on the same couch for hours uninterrupted?

We could sleep all night without a small person summoning us?

Maybe 11 years from now we can do those things again! (Some of them anyway. I could never handle a full-size bed again.) But for now, we'll keep enjoying the ride!

Happy Anniversary, Blake!